"I just took a shower with the cockroach from hell...

He's in the bathroom right now, doing his hair!"

Can you name that movie?

I was just about ready to go to bed and realized that I had neglected to put something in my bag that I needed to have on hand tomorrow. So I went out into the hallway where my desk is and flipped on the hall light. I happened to catch movement on the wall to my left so I looked over and came face to face with what had to have been the LARGEST freaking cockroach on the planet! I backpedaled, tripped over my chair, reeled backward into the wire shelving that I have up holding my scrapbooking materials, knocking over a bunch of stuff. It's amazing to me that my children slept through this - the hallway is right above their room.

THIS is when I miss MacGyver the most. I can hire a mechanic to fix my car. I can hire a plumber to fix my pipes (well, my landlord can). I can find someone to help me out if the computer takes a dive. But who the hell do I call when it's 12:30am on a Saturday night and there is a cockroach the size of Paris Hilton's teacup Chihuahua hanging out on my WALL?!? And the damn thing FLIES! I about wet my pants on that one. Thankfully there was nothing to trip over. I probably would have broken a bone and then I'd really be up the creek without a paddle.

Damn deployment BUGS! Ugh. He's too far up on my wall (we have cathedral ceilings) to get at with a rolled up magazine (or War and Peace) and I can't reach him with the vacuum. Maybe I can shoot him. Nah - the noise might actually wake the kids up. And I'm sure it would freak out the neighbors. And then I'd have to figure out how to spackle over a bullet hole in the wall surrounded by cockroach guts. Blech.

Very little scares me. But I am now wide awake and in no hurry to go back to bed. What if he finds his way into my ROOM??? Good God. I miss you MacGyver!!!


- hfs

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

better late than never
but that is bird on a wire, with goldie hawn


Wrote this six years ago. Nothing's changed.  One of my favorite movies is 'Bull Durham'. And one of my favorite scenes in ...